Much like a woman cheating on her husband, Texas Republicans will do and say anything to avoid responsibility for their actions.
With just a few weeks to go in the Screw Job Session of 2021, GOP leadership and their $221 boot-lickers are searching high and low for excuses to give as to why their voter’s list of priorities was completely blown off.
Their favorite tactic is to simply run the clock out during session with distractions, a method which was deployed today in Dan Huberty’s speech about how he’s sorry he got wasted and slammed into those Mexicans with his Corvette.
It’s easy and somewhat believable to explain to the average citizen that “we only have 140 days every 2 years lol we just ran out of time.” Still, sometimes they need a little help from their friends for that extra spicy distraction.
You may have heard about this one.
Authorities said Thursday that an allegation that a lobbyist spiked the cocktail of a female legislative staffer, triggering the notification of the highest levels of state government and renewing attention about treatment of women at the Texas Capitol, will result in no criminal charges.
In a joint statement, the Texas Department of Public Safety and Travis County district attorney’s office said an investigation found that “no crime occurred in this instance.”
The investigation into the alleged drugging, which was to precede an unauthorized hanky-panky attempt, lasted about 12 seconds before it was officially ruled “exceedingly fake” by law enforcement. It was obvious that it was fake the moment the story went viral.
In normal times, people would have demanded proof of such allegations before telling the whole world. However, these aren’t normal times. Nope. It’s 2021, and everything is fake and gay.
So of course everyone started doing the “believe women” bit.
Leading the charge against the evil men and their He-Man Woman-Haters Club was the very well-respected and smart Shelby Slawson. She said she was going to stand with the non-existent victim by “wearing pink on Tuesday” and emphasized that we don’t need to focus on the identity of the imaginary person.
This is the level of political discourse under Dade Phelan, Burrows, Murphy etc. A complete hoax instantly turns into a fashion show, and we’re supposed to believe these men in charge should be respected?
— Shelby Slawson (@ShelbySlawson) April 25, 2021
In unison, we witnessed everyone get on board with the hoax.
Like small children, they latched onto whatever could distract them from doing what they should be doing.
Of course, a woman chimed in that she “can’t even.”
Scrolling through the comments of this one was like entering another dimension. A dimension of insanity only possible through mass censorship.
I wonder what kind of correlation exists between believing in this roofie hoax and believing in the ongoing virus hoax.
Dade Phelan even gave an impassioned speech about the fictitious incident. In his remarks, he announced that paper signs were going to be posted in House Member’s offices that would act as a constant reminder that women rule over the men in our society, and that if a woman wants to destroy any man, all she has to do is send off an email and make whatever claim she wants. The man will then get the Hillco treatment.
Q came out and said the whole thing looked like a revenge operation hatched from Ladyboy Bonnen and his loyalists.
I’ll tell you this much — a bunch of Gen-X’ers dumbed down by a decade of smartphone usage, stumbling through the execution of a Machiavellian political hit-job becomes a lot more believable when you realize they’re still under the impression that nobody is watching them but drugged-out midwits from the corporate press.
But other people are watching. Listening.
Oh, and this guy is watching, too.
Are all the scandals coming out right now part of a conspiracy to stack excuses on top of excuses to be used as a scapegoat for not passing Republican priorities?
The more important question is – do they think it’s going to work again?