Must be a slow news week.

Hawaii News Now:

HONOLULU (HawaiiNewsNow) - A couple living quietly in Kapolei for years were actually Russian spies, federal agents with the state Department Bureau of Diplomatic Security Service allege.

Walter Glenn Primose, also known as Bobby Edward Fort, and Gwynn Darle Morrison, aka Julie Lyn Montague, were arrested in a raid Friday morning.

Government records said the couple assumed the identities of dead babies from Texas in the 1980s, then used those identities to obtain Social Security cards, passports and driver’s licenses. Both are charged with identity theft, lying on their passport applications, and conspiracy to commit crimes against the United States.

It was very common in the 70s through the late 80’s for Americans looking for a “fresh start” to steal the identities of recently deceased children.

In 2022, stealing identities isn’t needed because we have an open border, and identities are both “fluid” and on a “spectrum” according to official government policy.

The evidence the government gives that this boomer couple living in Hawaii were secret Soviet spies consists of a decades-old Polaroid photograph of each in a costume.

This is not a joke. This is what is being reported by the media as the smoking gun evidence.

The complaint just talks about stealing dead kid’s identities, and alleges they were both conspiring together to use the fake identities to trick the government.

The media, however, is claiming that the couple attended Stephen F. Austin University and then became deep undercover Soviet spies, and were still actively spying for the USSR in 2022.

As far as we know, this is all centered around the costume photos.

I can’t tell if this is serious or if this is another January 6th insurrection against democracy from an AOL account.