MONITORING THE ISLAMIFICATION
SHARIA SHARIA SHARIA
This is a satirical article. Not to be taken serious. Enjoy.
It’s official, we’re all becoming Muslim soon.
Nobody seems to be able to stop it.
Here’s the question for our readers: if it’s going to happen, is there an upside to getting ahead of the curve and converting to Islam early?
That’s the question Current Revolt is asking as mosques rise at breakneck speed, rivaled only by the towering 90-foot monkey statues as the newly-arrived ethnic groups seek to lay claim on their freshly acquired territory.
Islam is mostly peaceful
This is meant to be a practical guide to understanding Islam for Texans in 2026. The #1 thing you can do to properly understand Islam is to ignore the last 1,400 years of history, especially their history with Christians. That essentially lets you take a “fresh look” at this fun and interesting people.
Now that we have properly laid the groundwork for the correct way to think about Muslims, let’s monitor the situation.
To prepare us for the new normal, Muslim evangelists are handing out welcome packets at schools.
This is an assortment of literature that was recently passed out at a high school in Wylie, TX.
Chris Krok, a local parent who has opted not to join the Texas caliphate, became visibly fired up over the school allowing this on campus.
“But Tommy, it can’t be true that they’re preaching Sharia law on Texas public school campuses. Abbott already banned Sharia law.”
Yes, dear reader with the impressive memory, you’re absolutely right. Gregory Wayne Abbott did, in fact, “ban” Sharia law in a widely publicized political spectacle.
If it strikes you as unsettling that our rock-ribbed conservative Governor put on a Sharia law “ban” spectacle while today’s Republican candidates are campaigning on banning it all over again, click here:
But what many people are starting to say is that there appears to be benefits to being Muslim.
A group of activists protesting against H-1B fraud in Allen, TX were informed by local police that it is illegal to hold a sign on the sidewalk while wearing a mask covering your face.
This includes Covid masks, according to police in the video. They dug up the city ordinance:
Thankfully the police officer was chill about his part in degrading the First Amendment, but if you read the ordinance closely you will see a nice little loophole:
…covers the participant’s face from view with the intent to conceals the wearer’s identity, except for coverings worn due to religious beliefs, practices, or observances
We all have to be flexible. This type of state suppression is only going in one direction, so we are currently advising all our readers to convert to Islam and wear burkas in order to continue to be able to exercise their rights to speak out against the ridiculous situation with the Indians and their massive H-1B fraud.
Understand your rights and how to use them correctly.
We will defeat the H-1B’s even if it means temporarily becoming Muslim women. Inshallah.
I seriously hope nobody reading this applauded when laws were passed to allow proselytism in public schools "for Jesus" or to ban face coverings on protestors "to stop Antifa". That would've been silly!
wonderful, nicely done. Thank you for predicting the near future. Now, do one on indians