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SPOOKY: TX Senator says Defund Border Wall, Migrants Coming Anyway
“We have more people crossing the border today than when I started.”
The man many people are saying is the best-sourced journalist at the Capitol, Scott Braddock, posted a “big if true” scoop to 𝕏 on Monday. The post suggested rumblings of give-up in the upper chamber regarding Greg Abbott’s continued insistence on funneling billions of dollars into a black hole of hoaxes called “border security.”
It was worse than that, bros.
It’s actually so bad that it’s funny.
During the discussion regarding Senate Bill 6, Senator Charles Perry [R-SD28] postulated that spending billions of dollars to “secure the border” only to see more people than ever invading is a funny thing Abbott is doing. He said it’s funny, and he’s tired of pretending that it’s not!
More accurately, he says they’ve spent all this money with no results, said they cannot burn money forever, and that Texas is on its way to “failure” as a state. (90 seconds)
The meeting was to talk about the funding in SB6, the expansion of Abbott’s river floaties, and a few more miles of border wall.
Senator Perry says that even this pathetic few miles of wall is built, by the time it is complete many millions more people will have come across the border to claim shit hole asylum. (44 seconds)
Recent reports show over 99% of these border sneakers are being handed a cell phone and court date for 2035 (or later) and allowed to stay in Texas.
“Border security” is an oxymoron under the Abbott approach. When asked about what the heck Abbott is planning to do about the border, Abbott spokeswoman Sarah Hicks says “that is a big question” and “there is a plan to look at all sorts of tools.” (12 seconds)
Abbott is looking at the tools as we speak, no doubt.
Abbott is looking at the tools in the same way he is looking at Colony Ridge—Very closely and with a large six figure donation.
Actually, there is no plan from these people, Chuck.
It is good to hear from Charles Perry out in Lubbock. Let’s check in on his 𝕏.
Still reppin’ the 2017 sanctuary cities ban, huh?
That was a neat trick wasn’t it? Ban sanctuary cities and end up with colonias.
Nevertheless, this was an interesting thing that happened in the Senate, as the lies about the border and the cognitive dissonance required to maintain them are beginning to weigh on Texas Republicans.
In honor of SB6 and HB4/SB11, it’s time to embrace the failure and let loose for Halloween by dressing up as an asylum seeker.
Steal this look for Halloween
The Asylum Seeker
If you want to do this right, you need to have everything in order—that means you must have your story straight, your documents prepped, and some sort of eye irritant on-hand in case you need to cry.
First, you need to watch examples of how to tell your sad story on YouTube.
You need to know how to speak English, but you should pretend you don’t. Focus on how you are scared of returning to your home country because of how bad it sucks.
For your Halloween costume, you can be a port of entry sneaker or a river s crosser—it doesn’t matter because you will be claiming asylum either way.
You’ll need to fill out form I-589 and carry it with you.
This is the form you use to tell the government about why you are oppressed and should be entitled to colonize this country.
To complete this, you need to find the page that looks like this.
You’ll want to go ahead and check all these boxes except the torture one. Don’t worry, you don’t need to provide any evidence for these claims to be granted asylum.
As this immigration lawyer points out, he’s never heard of a case being thrown out because the asylum seeker had zero evidence!
However, if you want to take your Halloween costume to the next level, you’ll need some evidence for your asylum claims.
You’ll want to plug all these factors into Chat GPT to generate your personal story.
Then, the asylum lawyer says you can use WhatsApp screenshots as supporting evidence, which I personally recommend. Just use a WhatsApp screenshot generator to create the evidence for your asylum case.
It should look like this.
Even though there are millions of asylum claims pending and nobody will look closely at your case, you still want to make these messages believable.
Any specific people or details you can add will only bolster your case.
“Wow your case for asylum shook me to the core” said everyone.
Instead of “trick or treat,” practice your asylum story on strangers this Halloween.
You only have 10 years to get your story straight before your official court date.