Top 5 Flexes from Election Night

For GOP Eyes Only

by Tommy Paine

On election night in Dallas County, roughly one thousand DS200 optical scanners counted ballots deep into the night, while officials issued a last-minute election extension. When the computers finally spit out the statewide results, they revealed something not seen in decades: Democrat turnout had surpassed Republican turnout in Texas.

This wasn’t the most conservative primary in Texas history, but there were some big winners. Still, when you compare today’s biggest flexes with those from two years ago, the winners don’t seem to be bringing the same level of anti-establishment rhetoric.

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This special election report is brought to you by Democrats moving away from Texas.

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Speaking of winners.

5. Nate Sheets

This race was complicated for many of us. Sid Miller forever won my heart in 2016 when he called Hillary Clinton a c*nt. It was a different time back then. Sid is a decorated veteran of the Meme Wars and one of the commanding generals of the Boomer Battalion online.

Nate Sheets ran a great campaign. It was high energy. I assume he’s geeked out from eating honey all the time. Sheets got some endorsements that might have helped, but I don’t think he really needed them.

I was torn. I can’t even remember who I ended up voting for. I liked them both. Either way, complete and total congratulations to Nate. Hopefully Sid stays involved in some small way, like maybe running for Chairman of the Republican Party of Texas.

Nate Sheets 1,041,863 (53%)

Sid Miller’s 936,666 (47%)

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Speaking of staying involved.

2. Brandon Herrera

This is a big one. Brandon Herrera has taken down Tony Gonzalez after his second attempt.

Glancing at left-leaning rags, they seem to think Tony Gonzalez dropping out after failing to win outright gives Democrats a better chance to win in November. Believe it or not, they are going with the “Hitler/Nazi” angle.

Unfortunately for the New York Times, the average mestizo voter in West Texas they’re counting on voting for Democrats probably ran into the same problem I did: the paywall.

This is a big deal because Brandon Herrera will be the first YouTuber elected to Congress. I’ve been subscribed to his channel since 2017 when he was first getting started. His early videos were rough and unpolished, but that authenticity made him relatable, and after watching him over the years it almost feels like you know him personally.

Brandon Herrera is totally epic, the first American to blaze this trail. When he is sworn in, Brandon’s first act of public service can be taking me out to shoot steel targets with some of the harder-to-import Russian small arms.

Tony is a sicko and it’s good he dropped out. Many people are saying the Tony Gonzalez story gets even sicker. You thought Cookiegate was bad? Consider how bad this Tony Gonzalez story is, and now consider that it might actually be much worse! Now, double consider that the deceased woman also has a young son.

Tony Gonzalez needs to leave Texas.

Brandon Herrera - 23,857 (43%)

Tony Gonzales - 22,979 (42%)

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You know who doesn’t need to leave Texas?

3. Steve Toth

Steve Toth crushed Dan Crenshaw. If only more incumbent elections went this way. Just an absolute smack down, and now CD 2 will have a representative who is much closer to the people.

I can’t imagine why anyone would want to serve in Congress, but Steve seems like a good dude and he has a solid reputation with people who are cool.

Hopefully he doesn’t turn gay in Congress and make everything about Israel. These Republicans starting wars in the Middle East seems to hurt our electoral chances. No? Fingers crossed.

Steve Toth - 31,637 (57.3%)

Dan Crenshaw - 21,715 (39.3%)

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Speaking of electoral chances.

2. Democrat turnout

More Democrats than Republicans cast ballots in Texas in 2026, according to the voting computers that reported the results.

Democrats cast about 100,000 more votes than Republicans, a margin roughly equal to one week of illegal immigration in 2021.

Republicans (real Republicans) are getting put in a situation by the inability of party leadership to get the politicians under control. Rather than spaz out and write a treatise on why this is, I will show this funny table illustrating what a mega donor in Texas politics thinks about the Texas GOP. Something I randomly saw.

Democrats - 2.3 million (51%)

Republicans - 2.2 million (49%)

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Speaking of real Republicans

1. Don Huffines

The sonovabitch did it, and I’m still giggling about it. The school choice piggy bank is about to be in the caring hands of Don Huffines.

A few weeks ago, I’m pretty sure I saw a billboard that just said:

Huffines for Comptroller

Deport Illegals

So epic.

Here’s the deal Patriots, Don Huffines is going to DOGE all the illegals back to Mexico, and there’s nothing James Talarico can do to stop it.

You read it right here, on Current Revolt — The Texas Newspaper of Record.