Sunday Summary (4/14/24)
The Texas Newspaper of Record
Welcome to the Sunday Summary. Catch up on the latest and greatest in Texas politics with our top articles this week.
This week’s comic is from Tommy Oliver:
Top stories from last week:
Invasioneering Feds Allow Immigrants to Identify as X-Men!
The most important discovery since the initial publication of the chart of the electromagnetic spectrum has been the very recent discovery that male and female are only two gender options out of trillions and possibly more. The Feds have applied this leading science to their Replacement Migration Project—making the project to replace Texans with whomever…
Collin County Drama Roundup
Collin County has been a source of much drama lately, unsurprising to anyone who has followed Texas politics long enough. Plano City Council Asks Planning and Zoning Commissioner to Resign (small update) On Friday, we published the following recorded audio of a conversation between Planning and Zoning Commissioner Bill Lisle and Plano City Council Member …
Checking in on Texas Democrats
The track pants of undocumented Democrats crossing the border came swishing to a halt for 4 minutes on Monday, as God blessed Texas with an epic total eclipse. The sun accomplished what Greg Abbott could not—stop the flow of migrants for 4 minutes! Could this latest wave of gimmigrants claim asylum based on a lack of eclipse opportunities in their home c…
Gimmigrants Stage Armed Robbery to Secure Benefits
There’s seemingly no end to the horde of gimmigrants (gimme-immigrants who ask for handouts) crossing the border with a sad story. After paying the cartels to cross through Mexico, it’s unsurprising that these gimmigrants are willing to commit all sorts of fraud and scams in order to stay here.
Many People Are Saying (4/12/24)
Welcome to “Many People Are Saying,” our once a week paid-subscriber article where we feature rumors we’re hearing, inside gossip in the political world, and projects and pieces we’re working on that we haven’t published yet. This week: Brent Hagenbuch accuses Current Revolt of being mean to his staff!